04 Mar 3 Steps to Overcome Any Kind of Adversity

Shit happens.

Sometimes life throws you one or many curveballs, testing your resilience and grit to power through adversities.

You’re put to the test every single day to show how much you’re willing to face every challenge with a smile and an open heart. Sometimes it’s easy, while other times it’s difficult to stay positive and keep your eyes for the light at the end of the tunnel.

Hear it from an adversity pro

I consider myself to be an unlucky traveler. If something can go wrong, it will. The university of life has handed me one bachelor, a couple graduate degrees, and I’m on the road to receiving my first doctorate in adversity handling. My textbook?

For example, each time I fly I either experience a delay, a cancellation, misplaced luggage, or I’ll they’ll run out of the chicken meal option when they get to my seat row.

I’ve come to accept this and factor it into my travel expenses and time. Literally. I’ll buy a ticket that has the least amount of layovers possible, even if it means spending a lot more money. 

This month I had two trips planned which I was super excited about. Both were to Italy. As I got excited to visit Milan and go back home to Venice, coronavirus hit. These two cities happened to be the biggest hot spots for infection, go figure. This was a truly exceptional situation, but I couldn’t believe I got this unlucky.

Living with bad travel luck has rendered me pretty low maintenance, as long as I have a clean pair of underwear and some moisturizer I’m good to go. Ok, maybe I need a bit more than that but you get the point!

So, here are my tried-and-true tips for overcoming almost any curveball coming your way, so you’re not caught off guard:

Always have a buffer

Remember to always prepare for inconveniences. I don’t mean worrying about any disruption or minor issue ahead of time, but take everything into account.

If you’re preparing for a long trip, take into account that things may go wrong at some point and allocate some extra time or resources just in case. For example, airports suggest arriving two-and-a-half hours before your flight. You never know how long the security check or how crowded the airport may be.

So, take that same thought process and apply it to most situations. You may be inconvenienced at some point and you don’t want to be ill-prepared.

If Google Maps says it takes 47 minutes to get from point A to point B with public transport, I’ll leave a few minutes earlier to make sure I get there on time in case the bus or metro lingers a bit too long at some stops. Or, when I go for a trip in a faraway country, I buy travel insurance to avoid most issues.

Learn to adapt to new circumstances

If you’re unprepared and things just keep going south, stay grounded and remember that whatever’s happening, it will be okay. When unexpected events occur, take a breather, plan your next move, and don’t dwell on the change for too long.

For example, in past trips, my luggage got misplaced at least 6-7 times, so I learned to pack an extra change of clothes and toiletry set in my carry-on.

I adapt to not having as many clothing choices and buy a shirt or a pair of pants somewhere in the new city I’m in until I get my stuff back. Sometimes I even feel a little relieved, because it means I won’t have to lug my baggage all the way to the hotel. The airline usually ships it.

I learned to see the positive side of these inconveniences. Instead of seeing it as an unfortunate event, I embrace the new challenge, proving to myself once again that I’m ready for anything.

Adapting to changing environments and circumstances helps build resourcefulness and problem-solving skills. Dealing with sadness, anger, and frustration is tough business, so if you develop these skills and find solutions, next time something goes wrong you know you’ll land on your feet. It’s not about just handling change well, it’s about functioning in a new environment and staying calm throughout.

To adjust well to change, it’s important to realize that it’s not about learning to like what is happening, but by forming new expectations about what’s happening that can lead to success in the new conditions. This skill requires mental, emotional, and physical energies to deal with logical implications, feelings, and bodily stress. Not to mention, these three energies have to be paired with open-mindedness for welcoming new mindsets and behaviors.

So, stay calm, embrace the unexpected event, and be open to trying new recources and processes to get stuff done. You may surprise yourself!

Accept when things go wrong

Sometimes, you really have no control over what happens and you’re left in a crappy situation in which all you can do is to be patient. Here, try to see the positive side. You’re okay, you will be fine, and it could be a lot worse.

Don’t waste time and energy trying to change things you can’t. Spending too much time thinking about and wishing things were different won’t do any good and it will just add to your feeling of hopelessness, so here are some useful tips on how to accept your reality:

The first step to accepting things going wrong is to acknowledge the situation and not linger in denial. Realize what is happening and see it for what it is instead of what it could have been, this will help you accept it and move on.

Second, embrace your feelings. You may feel discomfort and disappointment, but it’s important to face this head-on so you can work through them and get past them. Call a loved one, write your feelings, note how to prevent this next time, or whatever you have to do to lessen the stress.

Third, try to practice mindfulness and be grateful for what you have as opposed to what you don’t. It truly helps to keep in mind that you’re still better off than others, even when dealing with difficult situations. Take what happened as a learning opportunity, you’ll come out of it a stronger person with a valuable life lesson under your belt. Try to see the situation as an experience that will help you later in life.

Conclusion

Life is inevitably challenging and unsettling situations may come your way (knock on wood!) but it’s important to know how to prepare for and face them so you don’t end up making things worse.

I’ve had plenty of situations where I thought “why me??” or got angry over the unfairness of it all, but it didn’t help. I learned to foresee and accept unpredictable events as a part of this crazy adventure that is life.

I hope you found this useful. Let me know in the comments 🙂